Friday, September 25, 2009

Driving the kids... CRAZY!

If you read this blog you know I drive the kids to school in the morning and I get most of my material from the discussions with these 4-5 year old geniuses. Well this morning I decided to mess with them a little. I was in a good mood and we were listening to music, as we usually do.


It started with Evan mentioning that his neighbor wrote the Britney Spears song "Womanizer". Then this curly-headed boy start singing "womanizer, womanizer, woma, woma, womanizer, you're a womanizer..." and that just cracked me up. So I turned off the Imagination Movers CD, because how many times can you listen to "What's your favorite snack?" and started playing some Black-Eyed Peas.

Evan said he liked Boom Boom Pow and Tonight's Gonna Be A Good Night but when I played them he pretty much wrapped his head in his hands and covered his ears. I took that as a sign to stop. Then Evan came up with the quiet game. You all know it, everyone has to be quiet and the first person to say anything loses.

So we drove in silence for a few minutes and then Evan said something. I pointed at him and smiled and then Kiki said something too and I pointed at her and smiled. And it went downhill from there:

Abba: I am the winner, I am the winner, you are the losers, you are the losers (imagine a taunting sing-song way of saying this with an annoying voice)
Evan: No we're not. There are no winners and losers in this game.
Abba: Yes there are. I am the winner and you are the losers.
Kiki: No Abba! You are not the winner!
Abba: Loo-hoo-se-hers (with a big L on my forehead)!
Evan: You're cheating! There is no winner in this game!
Abba: Then what's the point of the game?
Evan: To see who can stay quiet the longest.
Abba: And I stay quiet the longest, so I am the winner of the quiet game. I am the winner, you are the losers. Loo-hoo-se-hers!
Kiki: No you're not! We're going to play another game.
Abba: Bring it on, suckahs! I am going to win every game we play today.

This is where these two start whispering in the back and trying to come up with a new game.

Kiki: We are going to play the "Wonder Woman and Wonder Boy Shooters" game.
Evan: Yeah!
Abba: How do you play that?
Kiki: You make shooters with your hands.
Evan: And then we shoot you and win the game.

So i point my fingers back at them and go "pshew-pshew, I got you both Wonder Woman and Wonder Boy. I win again!"

Kiki: We were not playing yet!
Evan: Yeah, we weren't ready!
Abba: Too bad losers! I win again (followed by a manaical laugh)!
Evan: You cheated! We weren't playing yet!
Kiki: Yeah Abba. You cheated!
Abba: How did I cheat?
Kiki: You didn't let us go first. The youngest always goes first, remember?
Abba: That rule only works for CandyLand. I was faster and I won again.

Kids are totally baffled. Speechless. Then Evan starts saying something about Bakugan battles and brawls and I have no idea what language he's speaking.

Evan: Bakugan this something something something and Bakugan that something something.
Abba: I don't know about any of that. I can't play it because I don't have any Bakugans.
Evan: Well, we're going to use invisible ones.
Abba: Well then I win again! Because my invisible Bakugans just beat all your Bakugans and once again, I am the winner and you are the losers. Loo-hoo-se-hers!!!

This caused a huge uproar. Something about me not following the battle and brawl rules, playing out of turn, not using the correct cards, etc. To which I simply replied that I don't really care because i won every game on our ride to school.

When we were standing in line at school I took this quick video:




When it was eventually our turn in line, I opened up the back door of the car and out came a bunch of screaming and yelling that made the poor teacher wince in pain. I am really sorry about all this, teachers.

But I was the winner!

To inifinty and beyond

I like messing with the kids on the car rides to school. So a couple of days ago we had a really interesting discussion about math. Now you have to remember they are 4-5 year old kids:


Evan: Do you know what the biggest number in the world is?
Abba: I think I do. Do you know what it is?
Evan: Yes, it's a googol.
Abba: How big is a googol?
Evan: It's got a lot of zeros.
Abba: That's right, it has a million zeros (actually my bad it only has 100 zeros).
Evan: Wow! How did you know that?
Kiki: Yeah, Abba, how did you know that?
Abba: You might not think it, but I know a lot of stuff.
Kiki: Is that the biggest number in the world?
Evan: Yes!
Abba: Well, actually, there are bigger numbers. Like, googol plus one.
Evan: That's not true.
Abba: How about two googols? Or 100 googols? Or a googol googols?
Kiki: Well, I know the biggest number in the world!
Abba: Really, what is it sweetie?
Kiki (whispering to Evan): Evan, what is the biggest number in the world?
Evan: I told you already, it's googol.
Kiki: The biggest number in the world is 8 million, 500, 80, 90, 100, 150 (whenever she gets to the big numbers she starts to confuse them a bit).
Abba: I know one number that is bigger than that.
Kiki: Really?
Abba: Yes, it's 8 million, 500, 80, 90, 100, 150 and one.
Kiki: Hmmmm....

This is where the kids were in deep thought/confusion for several minutes.

Kiki: I know the biggest number in the world!
Abba: What is it?
Kiki: It's called the "Biggest Number in the World!"
Abba: What about the "Biggest Number in the World" plus one?
Kiki: Stop it Abba!
Abba: What about the "Biggest Number in the World" plus two?
Kiki: STOP!
Abba: You're kind of right, you know?
Kiki: Why?
Abba: There really is no such thing as the biggest number in the world, because you can always add one more to it. So they call it infinity.
Kiki: Infinity?
Abba: Yeah, and you know what inifinity plus one is?
Kiki: No.
Abba: It's still inifinity.

And I didn't hear another peep out of them until we got to school.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Back from the beach

We're baaaaaack!

What a great vacation! We did our annual Litchfield Beach family vacation and got back home yesterday afternoon. Yes, pretty much everyone got sick again (Jeff and I think the filters in the AC system are the cause), but we still had a fantastic time. The weather could not have been better for this time of year and considering Atlanta got about 7 buckets worth of rain and we only got a sprinkle on Friday - I'll take it any day.

There are so many great stories to tell and one day when the kids are all grown up and I have more than 5 minutes to write this stuff down I might induce some self-hypnosis and try to remember everything. But for now, some highlights:

Adults - 8
Kids - 7
Total nights - 7
Nights Kiki slept in the same room as Sophie - 1.5
Nights I slept with Kiki on the sofas in the living room - .5
Nights Cynthia & I slept with a toddler limb on our head/back/butt - 4
Nights Bella slept in her crib - 7
Rummykub games I won - 0
Rummykub rules I hate - all of them
Games of Yahtzee I played - 1
Games I won - not even close
Golf rounds - 4 (well, one round but we were a foursome)
Discount on our rounds - 50%
Pars I made - about 5-6
Final score - 97 (low score for the group)
Dinners we all cooked - 4
Dinners the chef cooked - 1 (better than all of ours combined)
Beer/Wine consumed - way too much
Drive to the beach - 6.5 hours
Drive back home - 8+ hours (seriously, why is that?)
Hours without my Blackberry - many, many hours
Relaxing with our friends - Priceless


Sunday, September 6, 2009

Carnival in Alabama

It was a cool overcast day so I decided to take BOTH girls for a little ride on the Silver Comet Trail. Kiki on her princess bike, with training wheels and tassels, and Bella in her "bike" - the Abba-Powered Aubergine Bugaboo. Kiki has been apprehensive about actually doing any actual bike riding. She's been more into talking about it than physically doing it. So I figured the trail is nice and flat, no way she can complain about being scared of going down hills too fast and no other excuses.

We hit the trail at a pretty slow pace to start our journey. But a couple of hundred yards in people were just zooming past us so Kiki started to pick up the pace. Which eventually turned into a slow jog for me. Bella loves being outside so obviously she fell asleep 5 minutes into it.

I had to constantly remind Kiks to watch where she was going and stay in her lane. And not to swerve around and to stay in her lane and to watch where she was going. You get the point. But she was loving it! Absolutely loving every second. She did a fabulous job of riding and I made sure to compliment and encourage her.

Then she asked me where the trail goes to and I said it goes alllllll the way to Alabama. To which she responded that that's where she wanted to go because there was a special carnival in Alabama. She said it loud enough for a few walkers to hear and crack up. She was serious too. She would not turn around and head back to the car. At the 1.2 mile marker I finally said that she could keep going to Alabama and to call me when she gets there if she needs me to pick her up because Bella and I couldn't walk to Alabama. But since she has a bike and she is such an excellent rider she should go ahead and go.

So we headed back.

That's when the trouble started. Since I was jogging pretty much all the time now, I had to stop for some water. When Kiki saw the water she wanted some too. Then after 30 seconds she was thirsty again. Then after another thirty seconds she was thirsty again. And again. And again...

Eventually we got a rhythm going again and we were back to the watch where you're going stay in your lane routine. At one point she decided to look back at us and veered right off the trail. She knew something was wrong, probably by my look of panic, so she did the only appropriate thing and let go of the bike. Luckily I was close enough to grab her in mid-air and save the day.

That didn't phase her at all and a couple of minutes later while trying to go as fast as she can her sneaker slipped off the pedal and she lost control of the bike which once again veered right off the trail. This time I wasn't quick enough and she landed in a big mangled kid+bike pile in the grass. When I got to her she was cracking up and yelling that she's OK. I picked her up and brushed the grass off her face and we were back on track.

We eventually made it back to the car after working up a nice sweat. I am so proud of us for going 2.5 miles. Let's hope she likes it enough to try it again soon.

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